This piece is brought to you by Modibodi but it’s all my own glamorous story.
It’s never lost on me the fact that as a woman I have been able to grow three humans inside of me. It’s totally wild and wonderful and now, whenever I see a pregnant woman on the street I look at her like she is a magician as well. I also look at her and know what is about to unfold in her near future. All of the baby stuff is delicious but there are some other things that happen to our bodies post child growing that ain’t so cute.
My newest offspring is seven months old and I thought third time around there would be no more surprises, but whatta ya know, my small mind is still being blown on the daily.
If you have ever grown a few kids, or even just the one, you will nod along with the changes I am going to talk you through, in fine, gruesome but real detail.
Pre kids I could run, jump, laugh and sneeze freely. After kid one, all of those simple actions took on a whole new meaning. After even a little cough I often found myself needing to change my dacks. Then, the second baby came along and it turned into Niagra falls down there after a cackle with my mates. Even though I still do my kegels like a demon, after bub number three there is even more unwanted action going on down there. I miss my pelvic floor, but that mole has left me for dead.
Another thing that has made my jaw literally drop post kid number three, is the endless supply of fluid that exits the body. For a real 5-6 months post kid number three, I had to strap a pad to my pants 24/7 because…the fluid, So. Much. Fluid. I didn’t have this problem as much with my first two, but after number three I legit had (and still do have) a spare pair of undies in my bag at all times, and they aren’t for my kids.
I was venting to a breeder friend of mine a few months ago about how shocked I was with the situation going on ‘down there’. She proceeded to inform me smugly, about some undies she was using called Modibodi*. These jocks are basically leak proof underpants. They look like and feel your normal undies but they have a 3mm lining (which is so thin you can’t feel it) BUT they hold up to the equivalent of two tampons. She wears these and then just chucks them in the wash post wear. I was intrigued so I Googled the shit out of these bad boys and it seems loads of dames are getting around in Modibodi underpants. Broads are wearing these pants for a zillion different womanly reasons, such as to replace pads and tampons, for extra protection during the monthly flow and also for post preggo use like me, that right- discharge, periods, bladder leaks and all!
Which brings me to my final shock – the first period after birth. It is BRUTAL. My god, it was like all my post periods rolled into one big fuck you! It was heavy and painful and it totally took me by surprise. I had purchased some Modibodi online after my friend was basically shoving them down my throat and I was glad I did. I used the Modibodi pants as back up and thank god I did otherwise there would have been some embarrassing public scenes. Now, I use them pretty frequently on those last couple of days of my period when you think it’s gone and then, whoop nope it ain’t. I also use them on hot days because on top of all this sexy chat, I am a sweater. The holy grail of undies.is.here.
Oh the joys of being a broad who has bred.
*Modibodi is available online – AND something else you should know…they have new swimwear available too – it’s water repellent, leak proof (period flow and bladder leak protection) and holds up to 10ml of fluid. Cheers to that ladies! For more info and to purchase these fab products we lurve…you can check them out here.