The trash triangle between Khloe Kardashian, her cheating baby daddy Tristan and sister Kylie’s BFF gets messier by the day.
I know, who cares. But it highlights a couple of key pop culture truths: Khloe is easily the most likeable Kardashian and as Jezebel pointed out, ‘has over a decade of experience giving people the lowbrow reality TV they want‘. Her appeal is inarguable and as she goes through a very public and humiliating breakup, the mum of almost-one-year-old True is now facing a future of single parenthood (money does not buy good taste in men, it must be said).
Naturally, fans on social went nuts over the idea of Khloe becoming the next US Bacherlorette. Showrunner Mike Fleiss encouraged the flames by saying Khloe was in talks to star, which Kamp K swiftly shut down in a series of tweets:
— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) February 24, 2019
I’m not fucking clickbait right now. Stop or you will be hearing from my lawyers. How insensitive!! https://t.co/vTKi83nLUJ
— Khloé (@khloekardashian) February 24, 2019
Firstly – for people who are so self-involved with their own brand that they jam superfluous k’s into the group chat, it’s a bit rich to say ‘I need respect’ and get defensive about when and how the media scrutinise them. Their family fortune was built on social media clickbait. It should be renamed Klickbait™, in fact. Time will tell if the US Bachelorette franchise gets a much-needed dose of Hot Mess via Khloe’s appearance, but in all likelihood she’s not in the best place to be wooing suitors and would probably make a shamozzle of things.
But is it about time we got a capable, self-reliant single mum Bachelorette to cheer for? Hells yes. Single mums are often fighting against an offensively out-dated stereotype. On TV, they’re depicted as exhausted, poor, desperate for a wine and even more desperate for a root. But the single mums I know aren’t like that at all. (I mean, of course everyone’s tired, but that’s just Being A Human). The frazzled, hanging-by-a-thread characters we’re exposed to via Bad Moms, SMILF, Stranger Things, etc. are not all that helpful or original.
In reality, a lot of single mothers find solo parenting to be an incredibly fulfilling experience that works really well for them. And it’s not great ‘despite the circumstances’, it’s just great. They get to make every decision and rely on their own instincts and learned skill. It’s maximum responsibility with maximum reward. Sure, there are financial and practical problems to overcome and it’s not effortless, but what satisfying things in life really are?
But is it about time we got a capable, self-reliant single mum Bachelorette to cheer for? Hells yes.
There’s no shortage of celebrity single mamas – Katie Holmes, Sandra Bullock, Mindy Kaling, Angelina Jolie, Charlize Theron – getting shit done without harping on about it. Their lives are made very considerably easier by money, but their attitude is refreshing. Actress Michelle Williams says, “When you’ve been a parent for 11 years and you’ve done it alone, you don’t have romantic ideals, because you have a practical understanding that you can do it by yourself“. She doesn’t sound like she’s lacking or desperate. January Jones has a similar view: “My life is so full. It’s not like, ‘Aww, I wish I had a man.’ After I had Xander, I went on a couple of dates and I was like, ‘I’d rather be home sleeping, or watching TV, or hanging out with my kid'”. Amen to that.
For women who were previously in crap relationships or bad situations, being alone is freeing and exhilarating. Out of necessity, life becomes more efficient and streamlined. Plus, nobody knows what they want like a single woman with kids. Their values are clarified and they know themselves deeply. They’ve got a solid list of ‘must-haves’ in a partner, if they even choose to re-partner. When you’re a single parent, you quickly lose all patience for time-wasters, and only someone remarkably, genuinely special will even register on your radar, and deciding whether to pursue a new relationship is completely within your control.
The Bachelorette needs a modern update, and judging by the enthusiasm for the Khloe rumour, we’re all here for something new. Everyone is surely a bit bored of seeing fresh-faced 26-year-olds whose entire belief system about love is based on what they feel, rather than what they know. For inexperienced women in the their 20’s, a dream relationship is often ‘someone to have adventures with’. Dating with that kind of vague wishlist is easy. Finding a life partner is hard, and single mums aren’t afraid of hard.
There’s something very cool about a woman who sees value in her ability to build and sustain a successful life without a co-pilot. JK Rowling put it like this: “I would say to any single parent currently feeling the weight of stereotype or stigmatization that I am prouder of my years as a single mother than of any other part of my life”. The woman who created Harry bloody Potter is more stoked about her solo parenting achievements than the billions she made from the world’s most popular books. There is clearly something more powerful and attractive about the modern parent than we’ve seen before, and that’s why we need a single mum Bachelorette soon. Not one you feel sorry for, but one who paves the way for a new kind of love story.
Have a listen to our chat with former Aussie Bachelorette, Sophie Monk, below then come and hang with us in podcast land by subscribing to our pod here.