One of the most traumatic memories I have of Primary School is when the nit nurse would rock up unannounced and pry through our locks on the hunt for lice. Looking back on it I’m sure her actual job title wasn’t ‘Nit Nurse’ and she probably wasn’t even a nurse. But, in my mind she was the devil.
As a kid, I was anal retentive when it came to my hair. My poor mum used to spend the good part of every morning perfecting my side pony. Not ONE bump was allowed. The difference between a good and a bad day depended on how slick she could get it. I had this no bump obsession for majority of my primary school years. My mum is a saint for putting up with that shit.
Once every term in Primary school the Nit bitch (that turned nasty quickly didn’t it) would walk into the class room unannounced. She would always come in the first half of the day too, so my side pony would have to be taken out and I would suffer through the remainder of the day in misery. It was my form of torture.
She would line us all up, slap her latex gloves and fling her fingers carelessly through our hair. She sent the nit free kids back to our desks and the infested kids would have to follow her. HOW EMBARRASSING!
She would say that nits only like clean hair but still to this day I call bullshit. Fortunately I ducked the nit bullet on every single occasion but the sheer panic of having my hair messed up plus the possibility of social suicide was enough to make a permanent dint in my childhood memories.
One of my friends told me that her and her two brothers got nits once and the school Principal announced it to the whole assembly. What a jerk! Simple things like having nits in school is enough to make you an outcast for years.
I chatted about this with Nadia Bartel On The Couch. Check it out below…
Do you remember nit check?