Big Kids, Parenting

The BEST tip to get your kids to go to sleep

Monty by Monty
November 29th, 2018

You know what has been a right royal pain in my ballsack? Getting my kids to go the EFF to sleep at night.

They slept like angelic cuteness when they were babies but as the’ve gotten older, bedtime has become a hot annoying mess.

After I say goodnight one of them will yell out that they are hungry, or thirsty or have a tummy ache or can’t find their snuggy or they need to shit or another hug or or or or. Go the Fuck to sleeeeeep!

It got to breaking point when the bedtime circus literally blew out to a two hour, teeth-pulling process and we were falling into bed exhausted, frustrated and wishing harm on our offsprings.

Then a magical fairy who doubles as a child psych gave us a life changing bedtime tip and even though it cost me $150 bucks to get this bit of golden info, I am going to give it to you for free.

Tokens. The tip is tokens and these little things are worth their weight in gold.

You need to figure out what your kid’s currency is; maybe it’s stickers, lollies, toy cars or as is the case in my family – cold hard cash.

Every night my boys are given three tokens each. They cut them out of cardboard and decorated them and they treasure them dearly because every morning that they wake up with the tokens by their bedside, they can swap them over for 50 cent pieces.

If they yell out to us or get out of bed after we have said goodnight and left the room, they have to hand over one of their tokens and they do not fucking like that one bit. It’s brilliant.

We do a check list before they get into bed so there is no possible reason for them to lose a token. Toilet- tick, teeth- tick, drink by bed- tick, bandaid by bed because for some reason they always need one at bed time- tick, snuggy in bed- tick, etc etc.

Then once we read a book and say goodnight the tokens kick in. We take a token for EVERYTHING. It may seem brutal and as my six year old said “that’s cruel” but the little suckers will always find a loop hole so you gotta be strong. It’s so fine if they call out but it will cost them a token. Sore tummy? That’s a bummer, but it will still cost ya.

It has worked wonders for us. Our two hour bedtime bullshit has crunched down to about 20-30 minutes and although there is still too much annoying effing around before they actually get their bums into bed, it has been a game changer.

Let me know if you give it a try,

M xx