Big Kids, Parenting, Popular Stuff

I’m SO over my kids fighting!

Carla McConnell by Carla McConnell
February 22nd, 2017

My two girls are 7-years-old and 3-years-old and they fight ALL the time. Yesterday I leaned exhaustedly onto a shop counter, as the shop attendent smiled sweetly and said, “Your girls are gorgeous.” Without thinking I replied, “I like them separately but not together.” From the look on her face I’m pretty sure she was about to speed dial Human Services.

She would totally get it if she had been there to witness my morning which included a fight over which Barbie DVD they watched, or who had the yellow spoon with their breakfast. The pushing and shoving over who got to sit on my lap and when one whinged, cried and threw tantrums because I accidentally read a longer book to the other one. God help me.

This happens most days, actually every day and I am drained. Drained to the core.

My 7-year-old, like most first children, is well behaved and tries her best to always do the right thing. She’s helpful and clever and artistic and I really enjoy her company. My 3-year-old is the happiest person in the world, she is active and funny and nothing gets her down. They are awesome kids and I adore them. However, together they are a NIGHTMARE.

They seem to bring out the worst in each other. My 3-year-old will bite, kick and lie her way to win any confrontation with her older sister, while my oldest will cry and sulk at the drop of a hat. They are not a good combination. They are sisters who came from the exact same place, but they are so different and they clash ALL THE TIME! I’m pretty sure I could run the world with the energy I put into sorting out their constant bickering.

So cute when they are not clawing each other's eyes out

So cute when they are not clawing each other’s eyes out

I find myself feeling stressed if I know we have a day at home with nothing planned. I’ve tried reasoning with them or disciplining them or separating them into different activities. Nothing works. They gravitate back to each other and the fighting begins again. I organise days where I have one-on-one time with each of them and it’s awesome, but the next day they are straight back into it.

The irony is they also absolutely adore each other. They share a room and can’t sleep if the other one isn’t there. To the outside world they are 100% on each other’s side. After hours and hours of fighting and I finally lose the plot, they will look at me angelically, arms wrapped around each other, and say “What’s up Mum?” Arghhhhhhhh.

I’m hoping it’s just a phase, and in a year’s time, this will all be a distant memory. I dreamt my girls would grow up and be best friends but I’m worried this is just the beginning of a long bickering road.

Shit, I just remembered I still have the teenage years ahead of me. I’m so bloody scared!

Do you have any helpful hints to stop siblings from fighting?