Love + Sex, Relationships

Remember sharing these kinds of details with your friends?

Steph Grapsas by Steph Grapsas
November 2nd, 2018

God I love a bit of sex goss. If you’ve recently had sex – especially if it was with a new partner – I am here for you. All day. And I’m a details gal, so you better believe I’ve got some questions lined up.

Hands up if you don’t talk about sex anywhere near as much as you used to? Guilty! I can remember nights with my mates drinking cheap wine, talking about who made the first move, and saying things like ‘back seat or front seat?’, or ‘how big?’ Now the wine is ever so slightly more expensive (let’s be real, not by much) and any mention of the back seat is baby seat related.

Insert BJ joke here.

I was at a friend’s baby shower recently, where a couple in their late 30s/early 40s made a cheeky joke when his mum asked him to give his wife a mouthful of his cake. Insert blowjob joke here.

She blushed, they both laughed, I laughed. His mum got the fuck out of there pretty quickly, then I laughed even harder. There’s a real intimacy in that not-so-private cheeky joke. These two have fun together, after a couple of kids and over a decade. People have digs at them about being like a couple of teenagers.

And why not? Why the taboo? We all gotta eat. It’s not like secretly online shopping (which I know nothing about and seems like a bizarre and mysterious behaviour I, again, know nothing about).

Salt ‘n’ Pepa got it right when they said, ‘Let’s talk about sex, baby.’

Sex in long-term relationships probably isn’t a newsworthy as the horny frolicking of a decade gone by. The only time we get excited about lighting candles at my place is when someone’s cooked a piece of fish and it reeks out the whole bloody house. Sex has changed, no doubt. Doesn’t mean it should be off the agenda.

So, my advice is to get some juicy sexy time under your belt (and in and around your belt area) with your significant other. Obviously not just for the sake of some really good sex talk. But mostly. It’s important for us to keep learning about sex through tales from beyond our valances. If life is crazy and you literally have to schedule it in, do it. A shared Google Calendar can be a much sexier tool than it lets on.

Now push it. Push it good.

*This article was not brought to you by Salt ‘n’ Pepa.