Relationships, Uncategorized, What's On Our Mind

Maybe there is no point in catching up face to face anymore?

Kristie Mercer by Kristie Mercer
October 6th, 2014

There are two types of people in this world – those who’ll hand write you a Birthday card and those who will send you a Facebook message instead. Those who check themselves out in the shop window as they pass by, and those who don’t even notice their reflection. Those who save their money and those who spend it on things that make them happy. The people who floss their teeth and those who forget each and every night. And those who consistently post what they’re doing on social media, and those who simply don’t.

I recently caught up with a really close mate of mine. It was something we hadn’t done together in ages! You know how it is, life gets busy and it’s easier to catch up within a group of friends and feel like you’re up to date with everyone rather than spend time one on one. But that’s kind of what made it so special. It was just the two of us, a pizza, a bottle of wine, the setting sun before us and three week’s worth of gossip to catch up on. But there was something that bugged me a little throughout our long overdue lady date that night – every few minutes my friend would  pause the flowing conversation and look down at her phone to scroll through Facebook, twitter or Instagram.


I felt like I was in High School again. Trying my heart out to command the audience before me with my drama monologue, bored eyes darting around to other more interesting objects in the room. A spider web in the corner of the roof, a crack down the wall, a bit of chewy stuck to someone’s school shoe. It’s such a terrible feeling to be telling someone a story and have them look back disinterested, disengaged. You feel this pressure to speed up your story to save you the embarrassment of their reflected boredom. And I felt this each and every time my friend pressed the home button on her iPhone to check if she’d received a Facebook alert within the 30 seconds since she’d last checked.

There’s an obsession these days to portray yourself in a certain way through your social media feeds. Seriously, what’s the point of drinking expensive champagne if you’re not going to whack a ‘sepia’ filter on that shit and brag about it to your Instagram buddies? There’s no need to go out on a girl’s night if you’re not going to check in at the bar on Facebook and hashtag ‘#mybitches’ whilst you’re there. It’s such bloody hard work! It’s hard enough these days to sync busy schedules and hang out with people in the flesh, let alone having to document every. single. moment for the masses.

Why are we so fixated on capturing a visual record of everything we do and sharing it with the world? How many times have you been mid-sentence with someone you haven’t seen in months, filling them in on an amazing holiday you just went on to hear ‘yeah I saw you went there on Facebook.’ Suddenly my tales seem irrelevant and outdated because they already saw my happy snaps of ‘the book’.

Our stories are churned out on a production line with one simple pic, no need for conversation anymore.

Everybody is so obsessed with being first when it comes to social media too. People love to tweet news stories when they first break, or be the first to comment on a Facebook post. There is a hidden power in being ‘the first’ share or comment on something new.

When you ‘share’ so much of your life on social media it’s hard to ‘catch up’ when you have nothing left to ‘catch up’ on. So now I vow to keep just a little of myself to myself. Just a little.

Check out Krisite’s podcast ‘Thinker girl’.