When I was a care-free teenager, my friends were my world, I though for sure we would all travel through the rest of our lives together and nothing would come in between us. But growing up (cringe) brought with it a lot of responsibilities (double cringe), and a hellava lot less time.
If you’d told me when I was 18 that I’d hardly see my high school best friend in six years time, I would have thought you were a filthy liar. No way on earth was that going to happen. We were going to be BFFL. After all we had set English exam’s together, had our first kisses and guzzled endless Cruisers together. This friendship was going to stand the test of time.
Yet as the years have gone on, things have crept in-between us, like work commitments, serious relationships and living circumstances. Now I barely know her at all. Our same-sameness in the confines of a school fence was no longer so same-same in adult world.
This isn’t the only friendship that has faded away over the years, my whole high school friendship group has shrunk down substantially. We are still ‘friends’ but that closeness and carefreeness just isnt there anymore. Instead of going days without chatting, with lots of them it is weeks, others months and most of them even years.
I really struggled with my friendships changing for quite a while. I would make an effort to catch up and even though the same ‘buzz’ wasn’t there, I tried to ignore it. Over time I came to grips with the fact that friendships naturally change, some grow closer and some end all together. The mates that I grew up with will always hold a special place in my heart, we had a ridiculous amount of fun and travelled through the pimply awkward phase together (and we all know that is a bloody tough time). But most of them, were partners in crime for that time in my life.
I am now 24 years old and have close friends from all over the place. From Uni, work, travels and nightclub dance floors. It is strange to think that as the years tick by some of these friendships will change too. Some will stay and some will fade.
When one person walks out of your life, another one is bound to enter it. Who knows who my closest friends or your closest friends will be in 10 years time – co-workers, yoga buddies, the parents we meet through our kids! Hopefully there will be some from now who have stuck it out for the long haul, but that’s something only time will tell.
How have your friendships changed over the years? Who are your closest friends now?
Monty and Justine Clarke talk about friendship On The Couch